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that the mechanism wouldn’t be there forever. Like most of the alien contrives, given time they always deteriorate without trace. My body and mind had been a vehicle for them to help them operate in our reality. Ihad often read of alien encounters where the subject had reported strange and unaccounted marks on their bodies such as incisions or foreign objects under the skin. I have never (consciously) recalled anything as physical or crude as this. Maybe that is due to what I surmised in an earlier chapter about subjects being prescribed different programmes “‘courses for horses” or maybe even contact with different races of beings. The ones that I had been involved with I suspect were more “mind orientated” and psychologically interactive than physical. I don’t ever remember physical examinations being carried out and never come across any strange or unaccounted marks. I always insisted that they only used me as a tool and abandoned me when I became of no further use. I have sensed great compassion and by that compassion I would be able to recognise my particular visitors anywhere. Whether or not I will remains to be seen. Similar to the reported “Greys” and “Nordics” and various others that seem to display certain patterns in people’s lives that typify them, my Programmers had shown an identifiable pattern. Part of that pattern is their psychological presence. I sensed a paternal kindness and wisdom commonly found in a religious elder such as a priest but on the other hand there is that distance making their wisdom seem incomprehensible and out of reach for the likes of a human. Because of that, they will always seem light years away, even in their immediate presence. Despite that I still miss them. Regardless of their departure without truly explaining who they ever were and all the jumbled and cryptic information they had left me with, I still desired that feeling of enlightenment when being in their company. Perhaps the one I missed most was the elusive contact they seemed to have appointed to me, Gideon. If there was anyone seemingly from this planet who emitted the same paternal, magical presence of the Programmers, he seemed to have had the art. I am convinced he was never human because of the magnitude of his intelligence and the manipulative command that intelligence had over my trust. Remember how he came into my life a total stranger. Early in ‘96 when it actually dawned on me that I may never see Gideon again, I desperately searched for his possible whereabouts and origin. I clarified with others such as Paul and Wendy who had actually met the man and how they would describe him. I wanted to confirm he wasn’t just a 88