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inability to keep still and my concentration span could be distracted by the tiniest of turbulence existing outside or in. I always suspected that I suffered from an extreme (non-fearful) nervous disposition or maybe even a level of consciousness so heightened that therapies such as hypnosis would probably seem crude. Simply getting me to relax would have been a challenge. On the other hand, something inside was manipulating my opinions. It was like having a type of “internal killjoy” that kept strongly dissuading me whenever this impetuousness about approaching someone crept in. Again I would have this mental burning sensation as I approached a taboo area of the Programmer’s work. I found this programming to be so clever that it would actually alter my opinions. It would make the exciting prospect of divulging my knowledge appear unappealing. The chances of revealing my experiences to anyone appeared rather slim. However, this was the stage in life that I was learning how they were not infallible. The recent breakthrough seemed to have made these entities panic, as if a terrible leakage had begun. I honestly felt now that there could be no denying in what was happening, starting with that memory of the school medical room, the psychic experiences and all of the bizarre dreams. The more they struggled to fix the leak the more it would escape in other areas. Their work seemed to be erupting in me prematurely. I was starting to think they were probably right; perhaps I wasn’t ready for any of this. It appeared to be more than I could contain. Their tactics at making me doubt things were indeed powerful and I suspect desperate measures went into that. There were days when I would think all of this was nonsense and just a product of my overactive and dreamy immaturity. I was terribly despondent when this happened. How could I ever put this doubting down to any outside influence? Sometimes I would suspect it was just the disappointing symptoms of a late arrival into adulthood rather than the work of ethereal controllers. Deep down I seemed to know that these "controllers" were actually the string-pullers of my whole belief system. Some of their induced doubts worked easier than others. The medical room incident, for example could have been an ill-recalled fantasy while the dreams were just dreams. Whenever the other ruminations occurred about paper objects sticking to me, the mutual dreaming or any of the undeniable psychic oddities, something else took place. Amnesia, or at least a botched attempt at it. Strange beings and their abilities to induce amnesia have always been a source of wonder for both UFOlogy and folklore. I have 36