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Months had passed and I began to realise that what I had written had “holes” in it. This wasn’t because my story was just an outline, it was because I realised so many other things had taken place that I was just starting to remember. Memories of events were continuing to surface and it felt that so much of what I put together needed rewriting. Some of the hazy events that I knew about were starting to get properly explained while others seemed totally new! This was the beginning of a confusing period of falsehoods and rewrites. It felt like I was regularly coming across these peepholes that enabled me to see things that bit clearer and each time I did, things needed to be added or altered. I cannot say when I will see the ultimate picture because those peephole memories still resurface. What I can say is that towards the end of 1999, my strange spell of obliviousness wore off and the picture seemed more reliable than it had ever been. My most recent revelation, the “night school” was perhaps the ultimate bombshell that turned everything my essay told upside down. All that had happened during my personal history of interaction and the beliefs that I insist stemmed from it had to be reconsidered. It seemed that what I had learned during that secret education of my childhood was the cornerstone for so many of the ideas I had about the world. The monk magicians, the magic they performed and the way they taught through demonstrative interaction didn’t truly occur to me until the autumn of ‘99, years after the secret schooling actually took place. I remember feeling awestruck by this memory and making a definite pledge to write more than just an essay. That autumn felt like a re-awakening for me because the spell of sluggishness was going and I believed at the time that a total recall of memory was looming. The spell and how it was ever cast remains a mystery but my assumption of the total recall was incorrect. The total recall is something that still slowly unfolds but maybe that particular time was a breakthrough. I felt a sudden clearing in my life and wanted to write. The end of ‘99 signified a special turning point. Added to all the millennial build up and the new century ahead came the lifting of a personal fog that had been clouding me for over three years. I suddenly felt collective and vibrant as though a deliberate restraint on my psyche had finally decided to let go. It was the long-awaited permission to write and I knew exactly how I was going to go about it. Millennium Night, as it will be remembered for decades, wasn’t particularly memorable for me celebratory-wise but I will never forget my new year’s resolution that night. I was going to write a book titled “The Otherness” that would tell the true story of my life’s interaction with a ghostly and alien environment. The “Otherness” pretty much summed 112