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is hard to put your finger on exactly what it is when it's so vague." "Yes, I'd agree. It's not something thatjumps out in front ofyou andjust knocks you up the side of the head and demands attention. It'sjust back there and you're aware ofit It's very hard to define but it's very present too.-I think I was afraid of myself, afraid because I didn't know myself. Iwas afraid to let anyone near me because I didn't know what I wanted. And I think I was also afraid of getting hurt But now, Iam starting to understand myself and I am begin- ning to see that Ican find some things about myself that I can like. Idon't have to be afraid or think I am different or odd because I can see that Iam not really that different from anybody else. My problem was that Iwas expecting too much out of life. I was expecting it to be here just like it is over there. And I was always disappointed when I would see life not live up to my expectations." "But,of course, you didn't realize that at the time you were expe- riencing those depressions." "No," he answered seriously. "Irealize that now, that I was expect- ing more out of this life than I should have. Now that I know, it makes the disappointments a lot easier to take because they aren't so personal. I discovered that everybody feels the disappointments. I'm not the only one. This isjust part ofthis existence,just part of being human. Now when I get depressed, it only lasts for a very short while and it's not bad at all because I know where it's coming from. I know now that everything's going to be all right." And what more could anyone ask for. I cannot say that Ishould get even partial credit for what happened to Phil, because I did not realize these changes were taking place. I did not even know about the problems he had dealt with all his life until he chose to confide inme. It would appear that discovering his alien heritage had a very positive influence on him. I believe that with the knowledge he received from his subconscious he has come to terms with himself and should be able to function as normally as anyone can in our chaotic world. Ifour work together helped to accomplish this, then Iam grateful for the opportunity. ONE EVENING I was idly watching a science-fiction movie with the familiar "aliens take over the world" theme. Unexpectedly, it was as though a voice spoke loud and clear inside my head. "Why do they portray us in this manner? This only instills more fear in an already fearful world. We are not like that, we have shown 286 The Keepers of the Garden