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afraid of... nothing. I couldn't pinpoint anything that I was afraid of. Iwouldjust have these feelings ofsome unseen dread of... something. And I would feel out of sync, out oftouch with reality. It's unusual for me to feel like that : Didthatlast vey long? Oh, it would last for maybe a day, halfa day. Different times. It's only happened about three or four times. It's not any long extended thing. It may be a day or two after we work, and itjust comes up from nowhere. A horrible feeling of being out of touch, out of control, and this terrible feeling of dread. I don't know what I'm dreading. I mean, there's nothing that I can visualize or even imagine. There's no focus for it. It'sjust a hor- riblefeeling of dread. Idon't know ifother people would think it's horrible. Maybe they've felt lots worse. But it's new to me. I've never felt that way before. And like I say, if I felt this wasn't important and I could walk away from it, I would. Because it really complicates my life. And I don't wanttocomplicate my life. : I thoughtthe otherthingswe worked onyears agomight have complicated it. You know, when we were workingon thepast lives andyou started channelingaboutthe seeding ofEarth. No, that didn't complicate it at all. In fact, that was separate. That seemed to be an addition to my life. But thisis directly in my life. It's not something that's separate. It's coming through a different channel, so to say, or something. : Yes. The past lives, even though they are strange, don't affect you directly. ww P: It's removed. D: Yes, this is related to this life; something that's been happening to you now. That would make a difference, wouldn't it? P: Yeah, You know, that first time we worked on this and I saw the little creatures in the road; Iremember the feeling of, "Idon't want to change my reality. I don't want this to happen." Iresisted it because it was changing my concept ofreality and my founda- tions. It feels like part ofwhat's happening now is that again my reality foundations are being challenged. The things that Ihave taken for granted and drawn so much strengthfrom, basing my perceptions of what is and isn't reality, is being ... frankly, shot to hell. Iwas genuinely worried that if Phil was confronted by something of this magnitude that he could not handle, I feared that the suicidal 250 The Keepers of the Garden