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somebody else’s blood; somebody else’s cut... and so I go running into the house with the eggs. I’m careful not to drop them, and I say, ‘Mom, look. I cut myself.’ She said, ‘What did you cut yourself on?’ and I said, ‘I don’t know. I just have a cut.’ She looked at it. She sees a lot of blood and she stops whatever she’s doing and she looks at it. She says, “Well, you must have felt it’... and I say, ‘I don’t know. All of a sudden there was blood. I don’t know what it was from.’ [Virginia uses a slightly different tone of voice when she repeats her mother’s words. ] Mother: Mother: VH: No, I didn’t feel it. I don’t know what Icut it on. VH: And then my mother said something to my grandfather. Mother: There’s something sharp in the barn? Mother: VH: And Gramp looked at it and he said, ‘What did you cut it on?’ and I said, ‘I don’t know. I just... suddenly it was bleeding. I don’t know what I cut it on. Gramp: ‘Does it hurt?’ 21 VH: And they wiped it off with a wet cloth and I’m just staring at it and I’m wondering why it doesn’t hurt and Mom put a bandage on it. It takes her awhile. It doesn’t stop bleeding, though. It’s still bleeding, though not as much. It’s itchy. It feels almost as though .. . it itches from the blood touching my skin but the wound itself doesn’t have any feeling at all. Like it isn’t even part of me. Like I’m looking at somebody else’s leg. VH: Well, I'm kind of afraid to watch myself get cut. That will bother me. [There follows a five-minute period in which VH discusses pain, her fear of it, and her fear of remembering this incident. It is clear to Dr. Clamar and to me that there is a definite resistance to further recall. After a pause, Virginia speaks again.] her VH: I think my leg was cut with a scalpel. It was just really sharp and clean... as if somebody made a nice, clean quick incision .. . and I don’t think that it hurt, but I think I expected it to hurt. [And again, Virginia hesitates to recall more details, and gives further examples of her fear of pain. But then she resumes her narrative. ] VH: They took a little cut. They didn’t mean to hurt me. Well, where were you? VH: I just got the eggs out of the barn. Well, didn’t you feel it? ‘Virginia cut herself.’ VH: ‘No, it doesn’t hurt. Gramps: ‘It’s a deep cut.’ AC: Ask your mind to help you recall how you got the cut. VH: How do [ ask It? AC: Let yourself go into yourself. [Further instructions from Dr. Clamar.]